Category: Chaos

When The Storms Don’t Cease

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, Future, Uncertainty1 Comment

Mentally close your eyes for a moment and imagine with me. You’ve had a long, hard day. It was a day that you don’t want to relive again. You just found out that your best friend lost his cousin to a gruesome murder – his head was chopped off! You want to comfort your friend but he doesn’t want you to. He just wants to work. You try to be a good buddy and go with him. You find out that the people who came to meet him are very demanding. They don’t care about your friend. They don’t want to leave him alone even for a few minutes. You feel like your faith went to trial. When the day finally ends, all you want to do is just get in to your boat and go home! Instead, you and your friends get caught in a violent storm. There isn’t a thing you can do to steady your boat. The winds and the waves seem to be rocking your already distraught world. The boat seems to be tipping over. The water is pouring in and you feel helpless. Broken. Tired. You just want all of this to end – NOW!

Suddenly you see a light. Surely it’s the coast guard coming to your rescue. Finally! As the light comes closer, you notice something. That’s not a coast guard. That’s a ghost! What the heck!!! Oh wait, that’s a person and he’s walking on water! How can this be? Still reeling from the shock, you see that the person walking on the water is actually your best friend who you left behind on the island. What is he doing here? How is he walking on water? What’s going? You just need to catch a breath and go to your friend, even if it means to walk on water. So, amidst the crazy storm, you call out to Him – “Jesus! If it’s really You, ask me to come to You.” Jesus agrees. You try to catch your balance and stand up. Your other friends think you are crazy but you don’t care. Jesus is here and all will be well! You step out of the boat despite your friends tugging at your shirt begging you not to be stupid but you somehow get out of their grip and take that step in faith. OMG! You’re walking on water! Your eyes are tightly fixed on Jesus and you’re walking toward Him. Small, easy strides. This is amazing! For a moment you forget about everything – the winds, the waves, the screaming friends, the rocking boat, everything! All you see is Jesus!

Until…

You take your eyes off of Jesus for a minute and your whole world comes crashing down! You notice the winds and the waves. You’re afraid the waters won’t hold you and that’s exactly what happens. You begin to sink. You don’t know what’s going on. Was it a mistake to step out of the boat? “Jesus!!!!!”

Storms. They’re not uncommon. They’re very much a part of your life as they are of mine. The scenario I asked you to envision is all too familiar to me. My greatest storm has been my lack of certainty. In less than a week, I will no longer be employed. While I have decided to stay on with Operation Christmas Child as a volunteer, I have doubts and fears of how I will sustain myself. That said, I have this sense of undeniable peace in the decision that I’ve made. I know that the Lord is not leading me back to India any time soon and I know that without a shadow of doubt. But I fear the uncertainty that comes with that understanding. For the most part, I’m at peace. I’m walking on the water, my eyes firmly fixed on my Lord, knowing full well that He is in control. Until… for but a split second I take my eyes off of Him and suddenly I am all too aware of the storm around me. My fears, failures, shortcomings, all gush at me with a force aimed specifically to make sure I drown. Struggling to keep my head above the water, I call out – Jesus!!!!!

When He finally gets me out, I ask myself, “What went wrong?” Jesus and I had this awesome thing going on. I was walking on water and my storm was nonexistent. Was it really though? I think that’s where most of us make a mistake. We assume that just because we are walking on the water our storms are silenced. May I propose that as long as our eyes are fixed on Jesus, He gives us the strength and the courage that we need to tread boldly on the stormy seas, toward Him? See, when our eyes are on Jesus, our storms won’t matter – Not because they don’t have power but because Jesus is more powerful; not because they don’t rock our world, but because Jesus is our anchor; not because they don’t scare the daylights out of us, but because Jesus is our comfort and strength! There’s an old song that I grew up singing, which I think is, apt for this post. It goes like this – “Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of the earth will go STRANGELY DIM in the light of His glory and grace!”

When the storms of your life don’t cease, remember – as long as you keep your eyes on the Lord, He will teach you to walk amidst that storm with your head held high, until it’s time for Him to look at the winds and the waves and say to them – “peace be still.” And they WILL obey!

In closely I must say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

 

“Hon, I Picked Up The Laundry”

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, Future, UncertaintyLeave a comment

I have a problem with TV shows. I get hooked on to one and that’s it! I’ll watch that series till it’s done… Binge watching if you must! My current show is White Collar and I watch it on my friend’s Netflix account (thanks Alex Bothmann!). The show is about agent Peter Burke and his investigations as the head of the White Collar division of the FBI. Peter is married to Elizabeth.

This particular episode began with Peter putting on his jacket and noticing that his wife had already picked up the laundry. They have a brief argument about it because Peter was supposed to have picked it up, but he forgot. So, Elizabeth picked up the laundry. I found this scene a bit odd because Peter and Elizabeth are the kind of couple that never fights. I mean, they NEVER fight. So the idea that the scriptwriter would include an argument between this happy couple over ‘laundry’ was a little weird.

Anyway…

Fast forward to the middle of the episode when Peter’s investigation turns south, and he ends up being taken hostage. He’s placed in a prison cell with his hands cuffed. There’s no way for him to get out but he must. He looks at his surroundings but doesn’t find anything that will help him get his cuffs off. Until, he tugs at the corner of his jacket and he finds … you guessed it – the receipt for the laundry attached to it with a safety pin. He immediately gets the safety pin off of his coat and uses it to un-cuff himself. You can guess what would’ve happened after that.

This scene brought to memory the opening scene of the show when Elizabeth tells Peter, “Hon, I picked up the laundry.” While at the time I didn’t understand the importance of that scene, I realized that the scriptwriter foresaw the need for Peter to have access to a safety pin. The scriptwriter knew exactly what he was doing when he created that scene, because he was the one writing the story.

This right here was my “Aha!” moment! Just a day or two before I watched this episode, my friend and I were talking about how similar the story of our lives were, and that sometimes we look at it and laugh about how ridiculous it seems. So much of what we go through makes zero sense! There are experiences I live through without ever realizing why I had to live through them. Half of the time I haven’t a clue where my life is headed either. However, I consciously remind myself that even though I don’t understand, the Writer of my story knows exactly what He is doing. He foresees what experiences I need because He is writing my story… every single detail of it. He knows what to include and when… He understands how each of my trials and experiences will be used to shape me into the person He is carving me to be. As long as I know Who the Writer of my story is, I have no need to worry about how my story is going to unfold itself.

I know Who the Writer of my story is. Do you know yours?

In closing I must say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

 

Go On, Make Your Move!

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, Future, UncertaintyLeave a comment

What you are about to read now is a post that is like none I’ve ever written. However, it is some fun food for thought. I decided for a change to get past the intense-learning write-ups I usually do, and write about something that’s a little … what shall I say… funner!  

I don’t consider myself a very traditional person. Please don’t get me wrong. I love traditions but I adhere to them within reason. Ever since I came to the United States, I changed a lot – in a good way – I’ve become more independent than I’ve ever been, I love high protein-low carb foods, I cook, and all in all I’ve developed a very healthy lifestyle. So I think it’s safe to say that I’ve adapted to a more modern/contemporary style of living and thinking. However, one area that I have still stayed rigid about is my opinion of guys and their roles in a relationship. Yes, I said it!

I firmly believe that the guy must ask the girl out. He must take the first step. No exceptions! It doesn’t matter if he is shy, soft-spoken or downright oblivious… nope! If he is a guy, by default he must make the move! Why I have this idea in my head is beyond me but I do. The other day, I was teasing a friend about a guy that she claims she “doesn’t” like (but actually, she does). I also made sure I went out of my way to give her a hard time about doing something about how she feels. Yes, I found great joy in doing this! We had a super lengthy conversation about what she should do to get his attention, how she should engage in a rendezvous with this guy, and the likes (Yes, I give fantastic advise. If you need some, don’t hesitate to ask!).

This conversation got me thinking about, who should actually make the first move? Is there even a standard operating procedure? Granted I was telling my friend to get her act together when I, myself don’t adhere to it. So, I wanted to put an end to this confusion once and for all and see what the Bible says about it. As I was thinking about some of the good-Book’s love stories, I realized that EVE went to Adam – Not the other way around. RUTH went to Boaz – Not the other way around. And, REBEKAH went to Isaac. Now granted that in Eve’s case God brought her to Adam. In Ruth’s case, Naomi orchestrated the match, and in Rebekah’s case, Abraham’s servant played the wingman. Nonetheless, in all of these classic Biblical love stories, the WOMEN made the move… Not the men! So where did I get the idea that the man should approach the woman first?

My dear single lady-friends, if you like a guy, don’t hesitate to take the first step. If you think he’s cute, tell him. If you want to pursue a relationship, ask him. Life is too short to be hung up on ideas that we think are ideal. Until I am able to gather the courage to take my own advice, you be brave. Throw aside your inhibitions and go on, make your move!

In closing I must say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

Bah-Humbug!

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, WorshipLeave a comment

If you know anything at all about me, you will know that I am a walking-talking Christmas cheerleader! I wait for Christmas all year long and as soon as November hits, much to the dismay of several people around me, I bring on the Christmas cheer. Christmas music, Christmas attire, planning the Christmas party… I even finish my Christmas shopping before anyone else. I remember when I was growing up, my mother, sister, me and some of our neighbors would spend our evenings making Christmas goodies. We’d spend the next morning distributing those very goodies to our teachers, friends, loved ones and even strangers. I’d go caroling late into the night with my youth group, heralding to the world the birth of our Savior. I’d spend every weekend participating in one Christmas program or another. I’d help my sister pack Christmas gifts for children in orphanages. I’d even leave random notes for my friends at work, bringing on the Christmas cheer.

When we spent Christmas at my uncle and aunt’s place, we’d stay up late nights decorating, munching on Christmas goodies, and chatting up a storm with my cousins. We’d re-live Christmases of the past, memories of childhood spent together, our hopes and dreams for the future… Christmas was so much more to me than just December 25th.

Until now.

This season marks 2yrs since I’ve been home for Christmas. I haven’t seen my sister since January 2014. I haven’t hugged my niece and my nephews and I haven’t hung out with my friends. I almost cringe at the thought of going to church because I get to sit by myself, while everyone else is sitting with his or her family or friends. During the regular part of the year, it doesn’t bother me because I know without a shadow of doubt that I am exactly where the Lord wants me. But during Christmas, when everyone talks about visiting his or her parents and siblings, it’s harder to see that. And definitely hearing Pere Como sing to me, “Oh there’s no place like home for the holidays,” surely does not make things easier. That said I am grateful for extended family and friends that the Lord has allowed me to spend this Christmas with. But I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss being home with my mother, father, sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephews. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t care that my whole family will be together – uncle, aunt, cousins – while I’m in a land that’s easily about 8,508 miles from them. I’d be lying if I said that I was looking forward to Christmas.

I woke up this morning dreading the idea of going to church because I’d be reminded of what I don’t have here. I’m not the kind of person who generally complains. If something doesn’t work, I shrug it off and move on with life. Usually, I remind myself of all that the Lord has blessed me with – friends I can now call family, a town that feels like home and a job that I am passionate about. Finally frustrated by my attitude toward this season, I watched Christmas movie after Christmas movie to see if I could bring on the cheer, like it was a switch that I could simply turn on. Needless to say that didn’t really work.

Until, I reflected on the true meaning of Christmas. You see, Christmas is not about decorating your home, baking goodies, or buying gifts for loved ones. It’s not about family traditions, childhood memories, or even – forgive me as I say this – about friends and family. No! Christmas is about Christ, and Christ alone. It is a time when we are reminded of the immeasurable love that God has for you and me, that He would send His one and only son in to this broken world, not just to fix it, but to restore it to Himself. It is a reminder that He saw us when even we didn’t see ourselves. It’s the assurance that because Jesus came in to this world to give His life up for broken people like you and me, and then rose up from the dead, defeating death once and for all, no matter how hopeless the world around us can seem, we will always have hope in Him.

Christmas is truly about just one thing – Christmas is about Jesus Christ, and for that reason alone, I will celebrate!

Merry Christmas!

In closing I have to say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

Back to Square One

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, Future, UncertaintyLeave a comment

One thing that I absolutely love about Samaritan’s Purse is the time of devotions we have in the morning. There is something unexplainably wonderful about soaking the start of your day in prayer and adoration of the One who is the very foundation of the organization, and truly, our lives itself. We start every morning with 15mins of devotion time, followed by another 15mins of praying for each other’s needs – sharing one another’s burdens if you will. Today was no exception.

The day began with a very special speaker. I’ve heard her speak twice to date and both times she made sure she hit the nail on the head! Today, she shared with us from the book of Isaiah, quoting chapter 6, verse 8, where Isaiah responds to a call and says, “Here I am. Send me.” She went on to expound on identifying the call that the Lord places in our lives and our God-instilled need to pursue that call. She challenged us to look beyond our need to create a sense of understanding and logic, to where God would use us next. She reminded us to shrug off our sense of security in the here and now, and keep our eyes firmly planted on the One who sees the bigger picture. If need be, we should get out of our comfort zone in obedience to what the Lord is asking of us to do.

For the most part this message challenged me. However, it also did an extremely good job of freaking me out. I had this overwhelming sense of uncertainty just pour over me. And just like that I was all too aware, that I was completely unaware about where I would be a little over a month from now. If you’ve read my previous blog posts, you would know that my position with Operation Christmas Child ends on January 26, 2016. That’s exactly 42 days from today. Compared to my previous times of waiting, I know for a fact that this time, I’ve done so much better. I have sought after the Lord, instead of seeking after my future. I gave Him first place in my life, and He gave me an unexplainable sense of peace. In this particular season of waiting, He truly became my anchor and my support system. But today, as the speaker challenged us to go wherever the Lord is calling us, I stopped to think about where God was calling me. And I realized, I had no clue – None whatsoever! I don’t know where I’m headed from here. I am convinced that the Lord is not calling me back to India… well, not yet at least. All I know, is that I love Jesus, and I adore children, and I will do whatever I am able, to bring them both together. Right now it means to share my story of receiving an Operation Christmas Child shoebox in India in 1999, and encouraging more and more people to pack shoeboxes as a tangible way of following Jesus’ heart of bringing children to Him. But what after that? I was back to square one!

I went back to my desk this morning with almost an overwhelming sense of dejection and – what’s the word I’m looking for – helplessness! As I sat down to start my day, I lay my head in my hands and finally shed a tear. You’d be amazed what crying a little can do for your soul. I lifted my voice in prayer, asking the Lord to help me never doubt His faithfulness in my life. He has never let me down to date. There is no reason why He’d start now. I asked for faith to look beyond my limited vision. I wiped my tears, put my earphones in and began working.

Then, I heard Chris Tomlin sing sweetly into my ears – “You’re a good, good Father, it’s who You are. I am loved by You. It’s who I am. You are perfect in all of Your ways to us.” As I hummed along, I was reminded all over again that God is my Father, He has nothing short of the best in store for me. Even in times of uncertainty, especially in times of uncertainty, His goodness is undeniable. And for now, resting in that understanding is more than enough for me.

In closing I have to say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

In Control? Seriously?

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, UncertaintyLeave a comment

Chaos! Chaos everywhere! Is there an end to all the innocent blood that is being shed? The Bible did predict this thousands of years ago – “You will hear of wars and rumors of wars … Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places (Matt 24:6-7)” – but it still is disheartening, discouraging and scary!

As I read the news about the recent bombings and bloodshed, I couldn’t help but wonder – Is God even watching all of this? Does He even care?

As a by-stander, a third person, I can safely say that the Lord is sovereign, He knows all things, etc., etc., the typical Christian outlook on things. But then I wonder, what about the people in the heart of this situation? What about the people who are injured and struggling between life and death in the hospital – would they think God is control? What about those whose bodies have been shred to pieces – would their families think God is in control? What about the wife who didn’t have a chance to say goodbye to her husband – would she think God is in control? What about the little boy who will never see his mom again – would he think God is in control? What about the father who is mourning the loss of his child – would he think God is in control? What about those who witnessed the blast, witnessed the loss of innocent blood, witnessed people being burnt, body parts flinging across the skies – would they think God is in control? What about the man who lost his arm, the woman who has to live without legs her entire life? What about the bride-to-be whose entire body is now scarred and face disfigured – would she think God is in control?

And as I sat back in reflection, I looked up and asked, “Lord, don’t You see? Don’t You care? Do You even know how it feels?”

And then, all of a sudden I felt something wet trickle down beside me – blood! Lots of it! I screamed! I got scared! It wasn’t my blood. Someone else was hurt and they were hurt real bad. I ran around looking for them. I stepped on something – it was a piece of flesh. I got even more scared! Was I at the scene of the bomb blast? I panicked. I looked around again. I ran. I bumped in to the tree. When I fell down, I saw another chunk of flesh! Wait! This didn’t seem like the effect of a blast. It seemed more like the flesh that was ripped off of someone’s body. Ewww!!! Who would do something like that?!!! I followed the blood trail as it led me up a hill top. The amount of blood I saw made me ask this question – after all this, does the person who is hurt,  even have a drop of blood remaining in his body?.I looked up at this man, completely bruised, blood all over his body, his face and body disfigured by what seemed like injuries made by a whip. The soldier stabbed the man in his side with a spear, and I had the answer to my question – there was indeed no more blood left in his body. Only serum oozed out. Every single drop of blood was shed. I watched this man, beaten, flogged, injured, disfigured beyond recognition. As darkness spread across the skies, I watched his body slump against the rugged cross. I watched the woman at his feet, weeping the loss of her son. I watched the expression of his friends who watched his horrific death. I watched as his father ran his fingers over his torn body. I watched as the soldiers got him off the cross. I watched as his parents went hysterical over their son’s lifeless body. I watched as his heavenly Father turned His face away. I watched as the innocent lamb was slain. I watched as the perfect sacrifice was made. I watched as the ransom was paid. I listened as I recollected what he’d said – “Father, in to Your hands I commit my spirit. It is finished!”

I shut my eyes at the revelation. Unshed tears now flowing down, as I reflected on the questions I raised just a few minutes ago, to the One Who I thought had distanced Himself from the suffering and injustice in this world.

“Lord, don’t You see? Don’t You care? Do You even know how it feels?”

And Jesus stretched out His nail pierced hands and said, “I know how it feels. I understand”

I knew then – I don’t have to wonder if God is still in control. He is. He sees. He knows. But He isn’t sitting with His arms folded – “The day is coming when the wicked will be judged, and justice will be served – For behold, the day is coming, burning like a furnace; and all the arrogant and every evildoer will be chaff; and the day that is coming will set them ablaze,” says the LORD of hosts (Malachi 4:1)

Until then,

My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.

I dare not trust the sweetest frame but wholly lean on Jesus’ name!

On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand!

The Lord is in His holy temple. Let all the earth keep silent before Him!

In closing I have to say, I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

Overwhelmed Much?

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, Uncertainty, WorshipLeave a comment

Recently I committed to reading the Bible cover to cover. Wait, let me rephrase that. I recently committed to STUDYING the Bible from cover to cover. The difference between the two words makes a world of a difference! So far, I have been able to read from Genesis through Nehemiah. I am currently reading the book of Job.

Funny story – I was sitting by Bass lake earlier today, reading my Bible. An elderly lady walked past me and asked if I was reading my Bible. When I responded yes, she wanted to know what book I was reading and I told her. She smiled at me and asked me if the reason I was reading it was because I was having troubles. Lol!

It is unfortunate isn’t it that we associate the book of Job with the troubles he went through, his whining, annoying friends…? I know that the book has a happy ending, as I believe every story should. But what caught my attention isn’t the ending. It is the beginning. Let me explain.

If you know the story of Job at all, you will remember that God permits Satan to try Job because God was confident that he would not turn his back on Him. Job was living a happy and content life. But before he knew it, BAM! BAM! BAM! BAM! Four catastrophes occurred, one after another.

  1. The Sabeans attacked and took all the oxen and the donkeys.

  2. Lightening struck all of his sheep.

  3. The Chaldeans made a raid and stole all the camels.

  4. ALL of Job’s children died – Not one, not two… ALL of them! 

Let’s take a moment and think about this. The Bible says that each of these incidents were reported to Job by a servant… the one servant that survived each of these catastrophes. That said, I encourage you to read the passage for yourself (Job 1: 13-22) and take into consideration the words the writer of this book uses to indicate how the servants brought these reports to Job. The Bible says, “While he was still speaking…” These words precede every incident. In other words, before Job even had the time to process one tragedy, another struck. Before he could come to terms with one loss, another hit. Talk about beating the wind out of someone!

His response to this overwhelming heart ache? He fell to the ground and WORSHIPPED! (Job 1:20)

I don’t know what it is that you are feeling overwhelmed about. May be you’ve received information that is life changing? Perhaps you are apprehensive about the future? Could it be that your present makes no sense? Or, you’ve lost a dear one? May be you just found out that you have a huge payment to make and you are completely broke? May I be so bold as to say – Regardless of your situation, would you like Job consider bowing down in worship?

Worshipping God in times of testing isn’t the most easiest of things to do. It probably will not solve your problems. However, bowing down in worship will give you the strength, the courage and the peace you need to catch a breath and humble yourself before the Lord, reminding yourself of who truly is in control. Worship is our way of stepping back and letting God bring order in to our chaos!

I doubt any of us is as overwhelmed as Job was. So, despite what he was going through, if he could fall down in worship, so can we!

In closing I have to say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!