Tag: Still

This is the Way. Walk in it.

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Future, Life, WorshipLeave a comment

I was recently deboarding a plane, and there was a mama behind me, calling out directions, “Go! Go!” I looked around to see who she was talking to. And sure enough, about 2ft off the floor, was this little munchkin toddling about behind me. She was listening to the instruction her mama was giving her, and followed through as best as she could. The mama was struggling with her bags and didn’t have enough hands to hold the toddler. I decided to help, and offered my guiding hand to this little explorer. She clutched my hand, and we made our way out of the plane, and down the stairs to the buses. Mama and baby were to go to Nigeria, while I was on my way to South Sudan. “Come on, let’s go. This way!” mama called out to the little girl when it was time for us to part ways. They were headed to Abuja. I was not. Whether the little girl kicked and screamed, or smiled and laughed, THAT was the direction she had to go in – the one her mama was leading her in.

Over the past few months I been thinking a lot about direction, God’s leading, choices, and the impact of our choices on the prevailing of God’s will. My prayer has been this – Lord, if I have a choice in the direction my life is headed, where does, “the steps of a righteous man are ordered by God,” come into play? Are You directing my steps, or am I choosing them?

The year 2023 is going to be a year of change, of new beginnings. It’s going to be a fresh start, in a new location, serving a new people. It is as scary, as it is exciting. The choice I make, will determine whether I stay in South Sudan, or move to another country. What if it’s a location I don’t want to go to? How will I know that that choice is the right one?

I was texting a friend about the direction I think the Lord is leading me in. No sooner than I pressed ‘send,’ I received a call, and on the other side was my loving friend, asking me with genuine concern, “Rachel, what are you doing? Have you thought this through? You know you have a choice. God can use you just as well in a different direction.”  Choice. I do have a choice.

From the time I asked myself that life defining question, “What is it that I’m doing that has any eternal gain?” my choices have been a series of denying myself and following Christ. Quitting a well-paying and stable job to pursue higher education at a time when I should’ve been home, starting a family and laying down roots; staying in the U.S. even when it didn’t seem like another job was on the horizon, trusting that He will provide; returning to India and feeling like I didn’t have the opportunity to lay down roots even though I desperately wanted to; coming to a conflict-ridden place like South Sudan; staying in this warzone for over three years; and now, heading to another disaster-stricken location.

The choices I have made have definitely not been in my best interest – at least in the way you and I understand it. But for the kingdom of heaven, they have been pivotal. God doesn’t need me to accomplish His purposes. I know this. And yet He calls out, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” My unequivocal response, a thousand times, is this – “Here I am Lord, send me” (Isaiah 6:8).  

Yes, I have a choice. Therefore, I choose to say yes to any, and every opportunity He gives me to walk in obedience to Him, and in service to His people, wherever they may be – India, America, South Sudan, Timbuktu.

And when you turn to the right or when you turn to the left, your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it’ ~ Isaiah 30:21

In closing I have to say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord

Hasta La Vista 2016!

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Future, Life3 Comments

In less than three days we will find ourselves at the threshold of a brand new year – 2017. I still remember when I rang in 2016. Where did the year go? When this year began I was pretty certain it would take its own sweet time to come to an end but boy was I wrong!!! Seems like just yesterday I wished the world a happy new year 2016.

When I look back at this year, I can barely get my bearings right as I think about all the experiences that unfolded over the past 12 months. In some ways my life doesn’t seem to have changed a bit since the beginning of 2016 to now – I was knee deep in uncertainty then and I am knee deep in uncertainty now. Along with that, another thing that hasn’t changed, is my hope in the God Who is in control of that uncertainty and the assurance that my future is uncertain only to me. God knows exactly what He’s doing!

2016 has been a year that has challenged me in more ways than I have the courage to admit. It opened my eyes to a whole new understanding of Who God is and His unwavering, unchanging character, which alone remains my anchor for the new year to come. This year has made me stronger, smarter, more vulnerable, more open to letting people see my not-so-strong side, more passionate, more loving, more giving and here’s my favorite – more sensitive to God and to what’s on His heart for both me and those around me.

From standing on the verge of giving up any idea of staying in the US, to watching the Lord move mountains to prove otherwise, to finally being convinced of where I belong, to heartbreaking disappointments, to feeling like the battle was mine alone, to throwing a tantrum before the Lord and then letting Him set me straight (Yikes!), to being consumed by an overwhelming sense of uncertainty over every aspect of my life, to understanding and for a change, truly trusting with all of my heart, even when I don’t see the evidence of that trust, that God, and He alone is in control of my past, present and future, 2016 year has been quite the roller coaster ride and I am a better woman for it.

I often wonder why trials and challenges come my way – I’m pretty certain I’m not the only one who thinks about this. Truth be told, the lessons you learn in your brokenness are the lessons that end up building your character and making you the person you were meant to be. Times of trials chisel our hearts to be sensitive to God’s love, His voice and His specific will for our lives, if we can only still ourselves long enough to trust His heart.

If there is one lesson I’ve learned this past year that I will surely take with me in to 2017, it is this – That God is unchanging and I can take Him for His word – Not my words. He says so in Micah 3:6, “I the Lord do not change.” Because of His unchanging character, I will, like the Psalmist say, “Your testimonies are my delight; They counsel me” (Ps 119:24).

Because He was my provider (Genesis 22:14) in 2016 and because He does not change, He will be my provider in 2017.

Because He loved me in 2016 and because He does not change, He will love me in 2017. Also, He’s already said that He loves me with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3).

Because His Word has been a lamp to my feet (Psalm 119:108) in 2016 and because He does not change, His Word will guide me in 2017.

Because He moved mountains to fight my battles on my behalf (2 Chronicles 20:15) in 2016 and because He does not change, He will fight my battles in 2017.

Because He knew the plans He had for me in 2016 and because He does not change, He knows the plans He has for me in 2017. Plans to prosper me and not harm me. Plans to give me a hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).

Because He held my hand and didn’t let go of me (Deuteronomy 31:6) in 2016 and because He does not change, He will hold my hand and won’t let go of me in 2017. And that confidence, that confidence alone is reason enough for me to look forward to a brand new year 2017.

Here’s to another roller coaster ride with God! Happy New Year everyone!

#neveradullmomentwithJesus

In closing I must say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

 

Growing Pains

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Chaos, Future, LifeLeave a comment

“Wait! What???” “Why this?” “Why here?” “Why now?”.

These are often questions that we ask ourselves when things don’t necessarily go our way. When life ceases to make sense we wonder what happened. What went wrong? If there’s anyone who knows what that feels like, it’s me!

I have lived in India my whole life. I was comfortable, satisfied and deeply content with where I was and what I was doing. I had a good job, a loving family and dear friends. I had no reason to move – except, I had no peace! I knew that God was calling me out of my comfort zone. When I said yes to coming to America, I gave God an ultimatum (not my smartest of moves). I told Him I’d give him 2 years and that’s it! But the more I waited on Him, the more He made it evident that my time in America was longer than 2 years. As someone who is part of a close knit family, accepting this was by far the hardest thing I’ve had to do. Since the time I came to the United States in 2013 to pursue higher education, I have come to realize that God never called us to a life of comfort. I felt like I was uprooted from everything familiar, holding on hastily for even a remote sense of identity! I had no friends, no family, and no community. I knew that I was exactly where I was supposed to be but it didn’t feel that way at all. Until, I came to the point of realizing that my identity is in Christ. He is my friend. He is my family. He is my community. He IS enough! 

Through these 3 years in America I’ve learned that getting comfortable means settling. When we settle, we don’t grow. If we don’t grow, we can’t bear fruit. And we are definitely called to bear fruit. Jesus says in John 15:5a – ‘I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit.’

While each of us has heard this verse several times, I don’t think we realize that growing is PAINFUL! It means stretching beyond what we are comfortable with. It means using muscles we didn’t use before. I think there is wisdom in saying that as Christians, we are constantly exercising our faith! 

There is a song that most of us are familiar with – ‘Oceans’. The bridge is very powerful. It goes like this –

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

I’ve felt like my time in America was just that – Through times of unemployment, literal homelessness – living out of my car, loneliness, sheer disappointment and complete constant uncertainty, my trust in the Lord was being continuously stretched beyond borders. When I was offered a full time position with Operation Christmas Child as a National Spokesperson, for the first time in 3 years I felt like I could rest – I could catch a break; I could settle down; I could just be.

However, that feeling was very short lived. I learned on May 18, 2016 that my visa to stay in the United States did not come through. By this time next month, I will have wrapped up my life in America and moved back to India, where once again I will be standing face to face with the same questions I asked when I came to America – “Wait! What???” “Why this?” “Why here?” “Why now?” I will once again stand on the thresholds of unemployment, loneliness, disappointment and complete uncertainty! But having been stretched beyond my comfort, I know that it is time for me to exercise my faith. This means I will need to grow deeper in the Lord and I know that growing is going to hurt. It is going to be painful. I also know without a shadow of doubt that this pain is going to be worth it! Because, ‘We know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.’ Romans 8:28.

Even though I don’t know what my future holds,
I know WHO holds my future.
And for now, that is enough.

In closing I have to say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!

My Future – My Idol

On By Rachel ChadalavadaIn Future, UncertaintyLeave a comment

If you know me, you will know that I have been job-hunting since February this year. Some doors never opened, and some that opened, shut tight. As long as I was in school, I still had my Graduate Student Assistant position so I wasn’t worried or frustrated about not finding a job. And then, I graduated! I was happy, ecstatic, and jobless! Surely I would find something. Right? Evidently not!

I tend to be a planner. I like to know when and where my paycheck is coming from. I like to know where I am going, what I am doing. I like to be in the know of things. Apparently, that’s not how God works. After I graduated, the pressure of finding a job obviously went up and being an international student, I had only 90 days to find one. With that understanding, came the revelation that the lease on my apartment was up and I had to move. Without a job, a place to stay, or any income whatsoever, I was in a helpless state of affairs. I moved to Miami, Florida to stay at a cousin’s place while he and his family were out of town. 

My friends and family would agree that I am a rather patient person. I don’t get agitated very easily. So I felt I was justified in getting frustrated over my lack of employment, despite seeking after it for 7 months (February through August). I felt I did everything right. I began applying early. I prayed over every application I sent. I was faithful in applying. I did everything right. Then why was the Lord making me wait?

I was getting tired of people’s words of wisdom. “All in God’s time.” “God blesses those who wait.” “Good things happen to those who wait.” “They that wait on the Lord will renew their strength.” “God has a plan for you.” I know they meant well and were only trying to encourage me but it didn’t help my frustration. Rather, added to it. Why was God making me wait? Where did I go wrong?

So I decided to take it up with the Lord. My friends were finding jobs that they really wanted and would thrive in. They all seemed to have a plan. They knew where they were going. Me, not so much. It seemed unfair. I opened the Bible and I read. I spent time every day seeking after the Lord trying my hardest to see what He was trying to teach me. Evidently there was a lesson that I hadn’t learned. I had no doubt that my future was secure in the Lord. I had no doubt that He knew what He was doing. What frustrated me, was that I did not know what He was doing! 

One day as I opened my devotional, I read, “An idol is anything that takes God’s rightful place.” And everything began to make sense. The lesson that I was being taught over these past several months was just that. I had made my job seeking, my idol. Every waking moment I thought about my future. Every spare moment I was hunting for jobs. I even sought after the Lord ONLY to see where my life was headed. That was my mistake! How was I so blind to see that? I focused all of my energy on seeking after my future, and what’s next, instead of keeping my eyes on the One who holds that future. I had made my future, my idol. I let it consume me, so much so I was getting anxious and couldn’t sleep at night constantly thinking about where I was headed. 

If you are like me, waiting to see which door God is going to open for you, don’t fret. He’s got your back! Spend some time on the lessons that I learned and am still learning, that God might be teaching you as well.

  1. Is God #1 in your life? That’s His rightful place. Don’t give it to anyone, or anything else (Exodus 20:3).
  2. God is interested in your heart and what your heart seeks after (Jeremiah 17:10). 
  3. The Lord knows your need and if you look closely, you will see His providence. Do you have food, shade, and clothing? (Matthew 6:26-34).
  4. Your actions speak louder than your words. If you say you trust God and are still fretting over what will be, you probably have a little more trusting to do (Proverbs 3:5).
  5. God does have a plan for your future. It is for your good. It is for you to prosper. He will fulfill His plans (Isaiah 46:10).
  6. Seek the Lord. Seek Him not to find out what your future holds. Seek Him, to know Him. He’s worth seeking after (Matthew 6:33).
  7. Lay out your cards on the table. The Lord is concerned about you. He won’t dismiss your worries (Psalm 55:22).
  8. The waiting itself isn’t as important as the process of waiting. You are being refined. Embrace it. God never leaves His work incomplete (Philippians 1:6). 
  9. God sees the bigger picture (1 Corinthians 2:9).
  10. God has the best in store for you. Does anyone love you more than Him? (John 3:16; Romans 5:8; John 15:13; John 10:10).

While I do have a job now, once January gets here, I will have less than 20 days before I will need to leave America to go back to my country if I am not employed. Yes, I am still waiting. But now as I wait, my eyes are on Jesus, knowing full well that He is Lord (Psalm 46:10). 

So as you wait on the Lord, remember to “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6, NASB).

In closing I have to say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!