Since the time people found out about my return to India, I have received a range of reactions. Some have encouraged me to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus and trust Him with this next phase. Others have felt sorry for me and felt even more pain than I myself have felt. Still others have told me how wonderful it was that I was going to be closer to my family and some others bombarded me with questions of how I will survive in my motherland – the country that raised me for 26yrs of my life and made me the woman that I am today. Some (bless their hearts) were downright mortified hearing my news.
This made me ask myself – What are people seeing in my story? What stands out to them? And I wondered – If there was anything that I wanted people to take away from my story, what would it be? What would I want them to focus on? Who would I want to shine through my story?
This song by Big Daddy Weave came to mind –
If I told you my story
You would hear Hope that wouldn’t let go
And if I told you my story
You would hear Love that never gave up
And if I told you my story
You would hear Life, but it wasn’t mineIf I told you my story
You would hear victory over the enemy
And if I told you my story
You would hear freedom that was won for me
And if I told you my story
You would hear Life overcome the graveIf I should speak then let it be
Of the grace that is greater than all my sin
Of when justice was served and where mercy winsOf the kindness of Jesus that draws me in
Oh to tell you my story is to tell of HimThis is my story, this is my song
Praising my savior all the day long!
As I enter this new adventure that Jesus has very thoughtfully brought me to, I encourage you to not see the struggle, the pain, the confusion, the hurt, the disappointments or even the achievements I’ve had. Instead, my prayer is that you will see, very evidently, the loving Father, the victorious King and the great Comforter. To tell you my story, is to tell of Him!
In closing I have to say – I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord!
I lift my eyes up 
Rachel, you do not know me, but in a few months you would have had you been staying in America. You were scheduled to come and speak at our vacation BIble school this summer in Maryland. Although I was so excited to meet you and hear your OCC story, I think your “story” has become even more inspirational as I read about your trust in God and your obedience. When I got word this past Wednesday that you would be unable to come speak to our church because of your visa circumstances I was sitting on a curb outside of my church. I had locked myself out accidentally and was waiting for someone to let me in. I was leading a Bible study in the place of my mother as she was out of town. The lesson I had studied and prepared to lead for the day was “When our plans don’t line up with God’s plans.” Hello, God, right?! I have read your blog posts from the last few days. Your grace and obedience to God is overwhelming and so very inspiring to me! I think I may have gotten more from reading your heart through your blog than I would have if you’d actually been able to come and talk about OCC. You are in my prayers as you return to India. God has something in store for you there. I love what someone commented on one of your recent posts: “When you do not see His hands, trust His heart.” You, my friend, are so brave and strong for trusting His heart even though you cannot see His hands right now. I pray that you will be blessed in many, many ways “thy good and faithful servant.”
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Kristan, this so very kind of you to say. I am deeply touched that you chose to reach out to me. I was looking forward to coming to Maryland but God know exactly what He’s doing 🙂
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